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Apr 7 09 3:49 AM
Yesterday my sister told me that because she has had two abnormal smear tests in a row that she is being referred on to an OBGYN. She has some erosion of
the cervix and they think she may need some pre-cancerous cells burned off. I was so upset for her, but what upset me the most was that she told me she had
been having irregular bleeding since Christmas and never told me. We are very close and I knw she did't tell me becuase she thought I had too much going on
myself, but I would always be there for her the way she ahs been for me. She has been great in fact and is also a cardiac nurse so is great with Isabella, who
is due to go in to hospital for her second balloon valvoplasty operation this week, keep your fingers crossed for us. Also a few weeks ago my sister also told
me that she thought she was pregnant some months back, it was just after I had the laser surgery and had lost Alyssa. Again she didn't tell me and I wish
she would have, she wasn't trying for a baby, she is 24 but has been with her boyffriend for a few years so although it wouldn't have been planned they
would have been delighted. I just don't want her goin it alone with these things when she can always confide in me.
Also last week our family GP died and I was just devastated. She was a great Dr. and was so good to me over the years, even before my pregancy becuase she is a
good friend of the family. But now her surgery has to close becuase the licence is in her name, it is a big practice and now I have to find a new Dr. for
Isabella and also the counsellor that I see operates from that surgery so God knows what will happen. I am feeling panicked and afraid all the time, I suppose
becuase I have lost someone who was a huge supprt to me and now losing all of the people I know up there. Even the girls on reception were great, they knew our
circumstances and were su understanding. It will be a huge thing to have to palce our trust in another surgery, especially after all of the bad experiences we
I am so sorry for blabbing this all out but I know that you will probably understand more than anyone else can.
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Apr 15 09 11:15 AM
I can't begin to tell you how much I can relate to all you said in your original post. First let me say how sorry I am that you had to experience this
rollercoaster. Today is exactly one year to the day I was diagnosed with TTTS, 3 weeks later I lost Olivia, our donor, post surgery in Cinci. It has never
gotten any easier and as a matter of fact, I think it has gotten more difficult to deal with the pain. I, like you, also had an immense desire to have another
baby even before our pregnancy was over. I don't know why that is? It would be interesting to see how many mothers had that same desire. My case on
having another baby is different though, because I have two boys also. I hope that you do decide to go forward with another pregnancy and twins or singleton,
I hope it is a positive experience. There's no doubt that you will have fears and anxiety, I think anyone who has been through a situation such as this
always would. Pregnancy should be a happy, elated time, not a time filled with stress and you deserve to experience that. Thinking of you and hope you'll
reach your decision with peace!
Kim, I'm thinking of you! I can tell it's been a long time since I've been on here, you weren't expecting then! I'm soo happy for you and
praying that all will go well!
Sometimes I think its hard to get on this site and yet its also hard to stay away. No one else really understands what it feels like to lose a twin and
sometimes its just so hard. Thinking of all of you.
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